why easter candy, WHY?!?

here I am, 40 lbs lighter (this time)....well plus .4 as of yesterday, but 1/2 a pound isn't much, I'm convinced I can take that off next week and then some, especially since I have banned easter candy from my body.  I can't even believe I only gained half a pound last week considering how many Sarris jelly beans and reeses pb eggs I ate.  But god they were good.  I used the justification in my head that they are only around once a year, but yesterday was a wake up call and I have now told myself that I've had enough to hold me over for the rest of the year (which is 100% true).   And you  know the secret to why I didn't gain more?  Activity activity activity.  I worked out every damn day even though most day I really didn't want to, or had a really good excuse not to.  I found the time and worked my ass off.  So honestly what the wake up call was, wasn't the number on the scale, it's what that number would have been if I had used just a little (ok, a lot) self control. 

shred it!

I love this show I'm in now. four of the girls are also on weight watchers and last night all of the girls going on and on and on about how I look like I've lost weight. Who doesn’t love hearing that? It's nice to have people around who are on WW too, because I am a closet eater and it's easier to go off plan when you're not surrounded by people who know what the plan is. And also because they are supportive I guess.


I have started doing Jilliam Michaels 30 Day Shred. A lot of my friends are doing it so I thought I'd give it a try. It's not easy. I did 2 days in a row and on the second day I used 3 lb weights for some things and 4 lb weights for others, so by the third day I was pretty sore. It was then that I decided to go on line and read the reviews. I love reading negative reviews for stuff. A lot of people made the good point that you should take days off to give your muscles time to heal, and I remember hearing that back in my gym rat days, when I had a personal trainer. Someone else mentioned that if you don't do this, your muscles retain water, causing a temporary gain. So I've decided to do 2 days on, one day off. When/if I get to a point where I'm not that sore the next day, I'll stop skipping days. I don't see that happening.

Oh and I am no longer morbidly obese! I'm just plain obese! So exciting. My next goal is to hit 40 lbs gone. my next goal after that is to be in the 220s. I have been in the 230s for sooo long.

moving hell - go activity points! (activity pointsplus?)

I'm moving this week.  Today and tomorrow to be more specific.  So I'm not terribly focused on getting my wii workouts in today or tomorrow because I figure I'm already getting quite a work out in.  Anyway, I'm also not relaly paying attention to my food like I should.  Although this morning I talked myself out of the sausage egg and cheese crossant that I REALLY wanted and into the egg white on flat bread.  Go me.  For lunch I went to KFC and got 2 honey bbq snackers with potato wedges, ate about 3-4 wedges before deciding they weren't as good as I thought they would be and THREW THEM OUT.  I kid you not.  I actually did that.  And that's all I've had today.  I haven't been drinking water like I should and certainly not fruits and veggies but I'm fairly certain I'm staying under points and for the next few days that's probably all that's important.

Oh and I haven't updated on the dashboard in a while because I haven't had time, but I am doing fairly well on the WW scale, I've lost a total of 36.8 lbs!  I hope and pray this week is another loss, I got two comments yesterday alone from people saying they can tell I'm loosing (of course yesterday was the first day in a long time I've gotten a comment like that)

the road less traveled (by me)

I am exhausted today. I wrote down 2 points for creamer because i decided to get a second cup of coffee late in the afternoon. Right before I got up to go get said coffee, I decided I had a chocolate craving and I knew I had the points for it since i've hardly eaten today so I grabbed a dollar before I went down figuring I would try to figure out which candy bar in the machine would do the least damage.
I selected a simple hershey bar because everything else seemed too high (snickers) or wouldn't satisfy what I was looking for (twizzlers) Plus it has the added benfit of absolutely not being my favorite, so I wouldn't be like OMG This so so good, I could have one more. So i put my dollar in and guess what. The stupid bar got stuck in the machine. So now I'm at a crossroads.
Choice A) I could go to the receptionist, tell them the machine stole money from me and get my money back. I knew if I did this I would go back and get the bar, but then i would get two, because the first one was stuck by like a small flap and usually you end up with 2 in these situations. And I knew I was at a point in my exhaustedness that I most likely would not be able to stop at one if two were in front of me.
Choice B) I could take it as a sign from the universe, get my money back and NOT go back to the kitchen, but let's be real. I would then have the money and the craving and I felt in my heart of hearts that my self control was just shot. I would have gone for the chocolate.
Choice C) I could take this as a sign from the universe, get my coffee and go back to my desk, forfitting my money AND the candy. But then my craving goes unfullfilled possibly leading to a binge later, plus I'm out 80 cents.

Choice D) Go get my money, and pick something else. Though candy options are limited and I chose what I chose a reason. But I could go for a diet soda, which MAY also curb the sweet tooth for 0 calories.

And the answer is......





C!!! I completely talked myself down. I promised myself chinese food for dinner, which I wouldn't have the points for if I used them on chocolate. And I evaluated how I was feeling and decided I wasn't really craving chocolate, I was just tired and hungry and my will power was way down. The chinese food (chicken & broc w/ hot & sour soup) is a better option because it has nutritional value, I've had no lean protein today and am a little short on my veggies. I figured the stuck candybar was a sign from the universe and the 80 cents was a sacrifice to the ww gods for the momentary lapse in judgement when I've been doing so well this week.

down down down

I hate to jinx it, but I have had a very focused few weeks.  I am loving the new plan.  And now, I'm only . away from my lowest weight this time - I hope that's not too much pressure.  It's only 1/2 a day into my new week, but I seem to be just as focused. 

stupid Aunt Flo

I find that the week before I get my period, I cannot stay away from food - esp sweets, but pretty much anything high calorie is fair game. So I am finding this week, after an awesome massive 5 lb loss last week, especially hard. I want so desperately to keep loosing, but I seem to have absolutely zero self control. And because my rehearsals for the week were cancelled - and because of a snow storm, I have no place to go to escape the food. We don't even really keep "bad" stuff in the house, but damned if I can't go over my points+ in any situation. So tonight I've made plans to get out of the house, Saturday I have rehearsals and then I am supposed to go play laser tag with some friends Sat night but I may just go anyway and bring a book to get out of the house and do something active. I am DETERMINED not to go over my points this week, but I really feel like I’m fighting a loosing battle.

still here!

Still here, still on Weight Watchers, though during the two holiday weeks that was questionable. But I love challenges and while my leader didnt talk about it, the newsletter said they are starting one, and week one is tracking, which i have been diligently doing plus I started a self imposed "work out for 30 days in a row" challenge. Today is day five and going strong! Sending this from my phone which is why it's crap!